Memorial Stones in Words: Music in our House

Grateful for Grace hosts a Memorial Stone in Words carnival on the 30th of each month. From her blog: "In history, the Israelites often were told to make memorial stone pillars. These were piles of rock that were to remind the people (and tell others) that God had done something big in their lives. God knew (and still does) that people benefit from visuals. These memorial stones gave the people a chance to tell the story again, either to those who were there and need to be reminded, or to those who were not and needed to know what happened. It also was an opportunity to be refreshed in their faith."

I grew up taking both piano and flute lessons. And I didn't fully appreciate them, especially the piano lessons. And I can play Mary Had A Little Lamb on the piano. And that is about it. I have played my flute a few times for church events in the last five years. But, other than the radio or CD player, that is the only music that has been played in my house. I wanted my children to have the opportunity to take piano lessons, but it never worked out. We were too broke, didn't have room for a piano (once three different people offered to give us a piano in the space of a month!) , and finally, God just told me NO. I listened, and although I felt a bit bad, I trusted God in this. And let me tell you, it is hard being a homeschooler and not taking any music lessons. Probably about 99% of the homeschool population takes music lessons.

It helped that none of the boys wanted to take piano lessons. But as Leia got older, she was interested. Two Christmas's ago, we got her a little play keyboard, and she played on it. And continued to express interest in lessons. We told her when she was older.

Well, older arrived this summer. A homeschool mom, who is also one of the pastor's wives at our church, lives about a mile away and teaches piano lessons. I talked to her about piano lessons casually earlier this summer, but she wasn't sure if she had room in her schedule. I didn't pursue it. A friend offered the use of her keyboard for as long as we need. But the teacher part still wasn't there. I mentioned it to another friend, but still not sure if it was going to happen.

Well, this friend mentioned it to the teacher, and a Sunday after church, the teacher stopped by to give one of the boys their Bible he had forgotten at church. And she asked if we wanted her LAST time slot left. Now this teacher has never been to my house before. So, I took it as a sign from God that now the answer to piano lessons is YES! I guess when the teacher shows up to your house to offer lessons, you can know that God is in control.

So, Leia is taking piano lessons. And Obi decided that he would also like to take lessons, so he is taking them, also. Leia and Obi are sharing a lesson time, so Leia goes one week, and Obi the next. And they can both play a few little songs already, and are loving practicing. Let's hope it continues. But I think it will. I waited a long time for God to provide these lessons, and I am sure good things are going to come from them!

Memorial Stone in Words: Homeschooling

Grateful for Grace hosts a Memorial Stone in Words carnival on the 30th of each month. From her blog: "In history, the Israelites often were told to make memorial stone pillars. These were piles of rock that were to remind the people (and tell others) that God had done something big in their lives. God knew (and still does) that people benefit from visuals. These memorial stones gave the people a chance to tell the story again, either to those who were there and need to be reminded, or to those who were not and needed to know what happened. It also was an opportunity to be refreshed in their faith."

On the eve of the beginning of our 10th year homeschooling, I thought it was appropriate that My Memorial Stone in Words this month be on homeschooling and how we got started. When I first heard about homeschooling, I thought it was a very bad idea. I was going to college and coaching a girls' soccer team. On the soccer team were a pair of sisters who were homeschooled. I had never heard of it, and the two girls were on a team of the richest and meanest girls in town. So, needless to say, they didn't fit in. And I wasn't impressed with the idea.


Several years later, I was a mom of two and met a mom who was pregnant with her fourth child who homeschooled. By then I was intrigued by the idea, but I was working, hubby was going to school, and I didn't think there was any way that we would ever be able to homeschool.


When it came time for Han to start school, he went to a Christian elementary school. We were very happy with the school and his experience in kindergarten was wonderful. He loved his teacher and said she was his best friend at school. However, he was a poky learner and in speech therapy, after years of ear infections. We had him tested, at the request of his speech therapist, to see if he had some learning difficulties. The results came back basically saying that he would get behind in school and there was nothing they could do to help him until he was behind. This made no sense to us to wait to help him. We were very concerned about what to do.


A friend suggested homeschooling him, and I said that there was no way we could: I was still working, he was having trouble learning, and we needed help from professionals. The very next day a different friend suggested homeschooling and it was like a light bulb went off in my head and it made perfect sense. We would homeschool him for him to catch up, and then he could go back to school.


One of my friends used a textbook type curriculum and I looked at it and thought we could do it. Another friend used Sonlight and I looked at it and thought, "This is going to be great!" And our homeschool experience started out great. My hubby was home three days a week and did school with Han on his days home, then I was home the other two days and did school those days.


The following year, I started staying home and we continued homeschooling. In the spring I went to my first homeschool conference and I caught a vision of homeschooling as a lifestyle. And it was as if God breathed that vision on me, and we have never looked back. I do not evaluate every year to see if we will continue, and the kids never ask to go to school. Homeschooling is our way of life, and it suits us perfectly.


And Han continued to be a poky learner, especially in reading. When he was 9 years old, a light bulb went off in his head, and he became an avid reader. Today, he is a gifted reader. God used a child with a poky start to call us to homeschool and then blessed that same child. Isn't God good?

Memorial Stones in Words : A House Named Ebenezer

Grateful for Grace hosts a Memorial Stone in Words carnival on the 30th of each month. From her blog: "In history, the Israelites often were told to make memorial stone pillars. These were piles of rock that were to remind the people (and tell others) that God had done something big in their lives. God knew (and still does) that people benefit from visuals. These memorial stones gave the people a chance to tell the story again, either to those who were there and need to be reminded, or to those who were not and needed to know what happened. It also was an opportunity to be refreshed in their faith."

In my first Memorial Stones in Words post, I told about God's faithfulness in my getting to be a stay home mom of many children. This month I am writing about the house that God gave us.

When hubby and I first married, we lived in an apartment. Then when I was going to PT school, we bought a mobile home. We bought a newer and bigger mobile home after I graduated from PT school and started working. Then when Obi was 21 months old we bought a duplex. Our goal was always to have the cheapest housing to allow us to have hubby home with the babies. So, after hubby graduated, got a job, and I started staying home, we had the opportunity to build a house. We had four children and were living in our 1000 square foot, 2 bedroom, 1 bathroom plus a toilet, duplex. We were beyond excited.

Hubby's uncle is a builder and would build us a house for much less than the going price. So, we began building. Our idea of our dream house. The kids and I spent hours in our van watching them build through all the steps. And taking pictures and videoing. We took cookies and sodas to the concrete guys, put the kids hand prints in fresh cement, prayed and marched around our lot praying for our house and neighbors. It was our dream come true. We picked out everything in the house. Agonized over choices, trying to make the right choices and be economical at the same time. There was a lot of stress, but we could only imagine that we would get to live there when it was finished.

We didn't have anything fancy planned in our house. All we wanted was the biggest house we could get. All along I felt God providing and helping us in every detail. There were a few specific things that he did for me, personally, with the house.

1. When I had finally found the kitchen counter top that I loved, I had wanted to have a wood trim on the side of the laminate. We decided to save the money and go without. When the cabinet makers were trying to plan out the counter top, they had some difficulty figuring out the seams because of the very large countertop area. They called and told us that if we could add a wood trim, the seams would work out much better. I was thrilled. I had given up what I wanted, and God gave it back to me.

2. Hubby had laid wood floors with the help of some friends. He didn't want to stain them, and I did. One of the very few things we disagreed on in the whole process. On the last day that he could stain the floor, Hubby got up early, went and bought stain, and stained the floors. When I went to see them, I couldn't believe it. They were the EXACT color that I had imagined them, although I had never told my husband that. Again, God giving me the floor color that I wanted.

3. I had spent hours and multiple trips trying to pick out carpet and tile at a local store. With four young children in tow. It was a bit stressful. Finally made the choices, and they gave us a bid. Sounded great. I had picked very plain floor tile and white bathtub tile. Come to find out later, they had called our master bathroom the mudroom in the bid, and they wouldn't compromise the difference: the price was just much higher. Hubby had had it with them. He met me while my friend watched all the kids, we went to two stores, and in a matter of a few hours, picked out carpet that we liked better, and got beautiful tile for the master bathtub, and got travertine marble for 2 bathroom floors plus the laundry room, all for less than the first place's first bid. God was so good.

4. Our garage ended up having a very tall ceiling due to our lot and the way the roof line was. Just days after our roof trusses went on, hubby and his uncle were looking at it and realized that we could put a bonus room over the garage. In order to make it a real room, we would have to redo the roof trusses, but until then it was great storage. It was 500 square feet. This to people who were living with 6 people in 1000 square feet. We thought we had hit the jackpot. It was our five year plan to redo the trusses and make a great family room out there. And we were so thankful for the potential that it symbolized to us.

5. When we first built it, we only finished the upstairs, which was 1500 square feet. It felt enormous. Three bedrooms and 2 full baths. For the first time, everyone had their own bed. Within 6 months, we finished the basement with a huge family room/playroom, 2 bedrooms, a school room, and another bathroom. We truly felt like we lived in a mansion.

Soon after we moved in our pastor and his wife came to bless our house for us. I was telling them all the different things that God had done for us in the building of our house. Our pastor's wife said that I needed to tell the children and others the stories of God's faithfulness. It was then that it hit me that our house had a name: Ebenezer.

1 Samuel 7:12 says Then Samuel took a stone and set it up between Mizpah and Shen. He named it Ebenezer, saying, "Thus far has the LORD helped us."It was a memorial stone showing that God was with them. Our house was my memorial stone.

There is a hymn, Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing, which also mentions Ebenezer. In verse 2 it says,"Here I raise mine Ebenezer; hither by thy help I’m come..." This song always brings tears to my eyes.

Our house was wonderful for parties and entertaining. Plenty of room for adults upstairs, lots of room outside and downstairs for kids to play. Three different years we hosted big homeschool Christmas parties that my kids still talk about because of all the fun. We loved that house. We lived in the house for five years. A year ago this week we put our house up for sale. I couldn't believe that God would have us sell the house that he had gifted us. I even thought it wouldn't sell and maybe we could keep it and rent it out, so someday we could move back. God sold it in 59 days. I couldn't believe it.

This post is bittersweet. God lavished his love on me by the gift of our house, Ebenezer. And he led us to sell it and move away. It felt like a punishment. But it is a testimony of his provision for us in the past, his love for us even when we don't understand why he has moved us, and his plan for us in the future. We don't know what our future holds, but we do know the one who holds it.

Memorial Stones in Words

Grateful for Grace hosts a Memorial Stone in Words carnival on the 30th of each month. From her blog: "In history, the Israelites often were told to make memorial stone pillars. These were piles of rock that were to remind the people (and tell others) that God had done something big in their lives. God knew (and still does) that people benefit from visuals. These memorial stones gave the people a chance to tell the story again, either to those who were there and need to be reminded, or to those who were not and needed to know what happened. It also was an opportunity to be refreshed in their faith."


When my husband and I got married, I was going to finish my college degree, go to grad school, and then my husband would go to school. We weren't planning on having children. We said maybe in 10 years. I don't honestly think we would have made that decision if God hadn't intervened.


I graduated from college and was accepted into a physical therapy school. I was very excited to have a wonderful career as a physical therapist and make something of myself. Three months into the two year program, I discovered that I was pregnant. We were very poor, living on student loans and my husband's low paying job. We didn't know what we would do. I was very scared about having a baby, and being pregnant while going to school in the medical field is a very bad idea. You study all kinds of abnormal development and all the things that can go wrong. I was convinced that our baby would have all kinds of problems. I tried very hard not to bond with the baby to protect myself if something went wrong.



Well, our first born, Han, was born and was perfectly normal. And I feel deeply in love with him. When I first held him, every ounce of ambition fled my body. I was totally unprepared for the emotions that I felt, and all I wanted to do was stay home and be his mommy. However, I had to finish school and I had to get a job in order to pay off the loans for school for a degree that I no longer wanted.




So hubby stayed home with the baby and I went back to school when he was 12 days old. I was exhausted and cried every day because I did not want to leave him and miss out on his life. I graduated when he was a year old and went to work. The day after his second birthday, we had our second boy, Obi. I got six weeks of maternity leave and then, heartbroken, I went back to work.


My hubby was going to school part time to get a degree so that he could eventually get a job and I could possibly stay home. But, we didn't know if it would ever work out. He wasn't happy staying home full time, and I wasn't happy working. But, there was nothing else we could do at the time. I cried out to God to save us, to help us. My life was bittersweet. I actually loved my job, but I felt bad missing the boys and I felt like I was missing out on their lives while I was gone. My hubby was going to school, but didn't really know what he wanted to do. He loved spending time home with the boys and we were grateful they weren't in daycare, but men are not made to stay home.



We had our first (and only) planned child, Luke, almost 3 1/2 years after Obi was born. This time I had 12 weeks of maternity leave. I so loved being home, but everyday was one day closer to going back to work, and it made me very sad. The night before I went back to work, I was crying out to God about my desire to be home. God gave me the verse from Joel 2:25a And I will restore to you the years that the locust hath eaten.



Now, that verse made no sense to me. How could God give me back the time I had lost with my boys? How was there any end to our situation? We even thought that my hubby would graduate and that both of us would end up working to support our family. But I hung on to that verse for dear life.


Another verse that became very precious to me is Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. I chanted this verse at times to reassure myself that our life made sense to God, and that he did indeed have a good plan for us.


Hubby changed his major, went full time, and the end was in sight. When Luke was 2 1/2 years old, our first girl, Leia, was born. I went on maternity leave with her the day my hubby started an internship during the day while going to school at night. We were praying this internship would turn into a job. On the day that I needed to give my notice if I was not going back to work, my hubby got and accepted a job offer. I couldn't believe it. I was going to stay home and hubby would be working! And I remembered the verse. But it still didn't make sense to me. But I finally had a baby that I got to stay home with. (Actually, I did work about 6 to 10 weekends a year until Yoda's birth.)



We had started homeschooling Han when he was in first grade. This was hubby's last year home, and he was the primary teacher. When I started staying home, I took over. Han was in second grade and Obi was in kindergarten, which mostly involved playing with toddler Luke so we could do Han's school work! God's calling us to homeschool allowed me to be home with the boys even though they were of school age. One of my fears had been that I would finally get to stay home, but the boys would be gone to school all day.



Three years after Leia, along came Padme, and four years later, we have baby Yoda. God has given me three babies that I got to stay home with, in addition to homeschooling the others so that I had plenty of time with them. God's way of restoring the years that I felt I lost by working. Isn't he good? And so faithful. There were many hard and dark days for me when I despaired of our situation, but God had a plan, and it was better than what I had even hoped for.